8.19.2005

Good Will Hunting

Starring: 2 Afflecks, 2 pricks, and Robin Williams
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PROFESSOR SWEDE
You're smart. Why are you a janitor?

MATT DAMON
Because I'm also a bad boy, motherfucker.

PROFESSOR SWEDE
I detect you have emotional problems. Go see friendly therapist, Robin Williams.

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DR. ROBIN WILLIAMS
Hello, Will.

MATT DAMON
I hate you, you stupid fucking quack.

DR. ROBIN WILLIAMS
My wife farted in bed.

MATT DAMON
I love you.

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(Matt Damon is at a bar with preppy college students and Minnie Driver.)

PREPPY COLLEGE STUDENT
Blah blah blah Karl Marx blah blah blah Jean Paul Sartre blah blah blah Thomas Hobbes...

(Minnie Driver is not impressed. Matt Damon begins to talk like the Architect in The Matrix. Now Minnie Driver is impressed.)

MATT DAMON (to Preppy College Student)
I got her number. How do you like them apples?

PREPPY COLLEGE STUDENT
She looks like a man. How do you like them apples?

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MINNIE DRIVER
Will, I love you.

MATT DAMON
And I hate you.

(Minnie Driver leaves.)

MATT DAMON
Was it something I said?

THE END

2 Comments:

At 8/22/2005 9:32 PM, Anonymous Andrea said...

Hilarious. Good job.

 
At 8/27/2005 12:59 AM, Blogger super8films said...

I seriously think you should take all these MOVIES BY THE MINUTE stories and publish a book. They are truly hilarious!
-Jeff K.

 

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